2015 Power Rankings-Playoffs 4
Introduction In the ancient scrolls of Nostradamukong Suh, the great seer of the Fantasy Gods writes: ' ' He who wields the power of the ground game, Who relentlessly scours the open waters of free agency, Shall rise triumphant as a beast with two heads, King over all who dare defy him. ' ' And so the prophecy has been fulfilled. The Shotti Bunch, known since creation in 2012 for the punishing run game, has become the first repeat champion in the LOC. The prophecy also states: ' ' Thou who dare defeat the Commisioner of these lands in the semi-finals, Who defiles the integrity of the league by fleeing to foreign shores, Shall forever be shamed and marked as he who fell twice in a row In Championship Games, never to be respected again. ' ' That one is a little bit more cryptic so I don’t want to speculate on what that might be referring to… How close did MMMS come to winning the Championship? One...fucking...yard. More on that below. ' ' In any case, that’s all she wrote. The football sandwich has been eaten. This has been the fastest 17 weeks of my life. And I have no doubt that next season will go by even faster, and faster and faster until we’re all dead and Nate still hasn’t won a championship. Of everyone I’ve spoken to, the sentiment has been the same. We want this same group back next year. This was the most solid group I think the league has ever seen. This year we saw all ten teams put forth a solid effort from beginning to end, everyone passionately laboring over their teams in an attempt to be at least one game better than Patrick. For that, I am thankful. Not just that people care about this league, but that in part caring about the league means you care about each other a little bit, too. ' ' Let’s wrap things up here with a review of the Championship game and a look ahead at what 2016 has in store for the League of Champions. ' ' How The War Was Won Without our knowledge, the story of the championship game began to be written on November 23rd. At the time, CJ Anderson was a certified bust. Drafted by The Shotti Bunch 27th overall in the third round, the Denver runningback had only started five games for TSB and amassed just 158 yards on the ground. One of many disappointments for Shotti, the team continued to turn over RBs in a season defined for everyone by injuries. Powell, the week 16 starter for TSB that put up 15.40 in relief of certified bust DeMarco Murray (14.78 on the bench that week), wasn’t picked up off of Free Agency until December 22, the day the matchup started. However, the real steal for TSB was Tim Hightower, picked up on December 15th, who scored 45.95 in relief of TJ Yeldon. Yeldon was the surprise Jacksonville starter who was out with an injury for the Championship Game. One RB that The Shotti Bunch couldn’t pick back up was CJ Anderson, because that player belonged to ma ma momma said. MMMS had seen the opportunity to steal CJ Anderson on November 30th, immediately following a 45 point performance against the Patriots. ' ' If the loss of Yeldon was a big hit for TSB, it was nothing compared to the loss of Odell Beckham Jr. for ma ma momma said. Not only would this hurt the WR position, but it had a direct effect on QB1 Manning and the entire NYG offense, decreasing the production of kicker Josh Brown. To make matters worse, Dez Bryant was deactivated for the remainder of the season. Dez was coming off a big game in which he scored his third TD of the season. All of a sudden the league’s deadliest WR core was looking too thin to take the big game. Needing to compete with the ground force of TSB, MMMS shifted focus and started a lineup of four RBs. Among them, CJ Anderson. ' ' As Sunday progressed, it seemed one team came to play and the other didn’t. Gronkowski, Newton, Evans, and Jackson all failed to meet their projections for TSB, while on the other side Landry, Freeman, Jennings, Reed, and Johnson all scored over 20 points. The biggest sign that things were not meant to be for The Shotti Bunch was down in the defense. Shotti had started Arizona Defense for 13 games this season. Unquestionably superior to Miami Defense, TSB opted to go with the latter in hopes of playing the matchups to his advantage. Miami was facing off against the Colts and their 4th string QB, while Arizona had Aaron Rodgers. ' ' The gamble backfired. Arizona scored an even 73 points...on the bench. Miami put up a respectable 20, but not nearly enough to justify the switch. It seemed that hope was lost, with the move haunting TSB for years. ' ' Yet, that wasn’t the way the story ended. Things may not have been going the right way for Shotti, but if the Vikings defense could put up a big game and hold the Giants below their projections, they still stood a chance. With all of their players done, it was time to watch and hope for a miracle. At 223.49, TSB had a decent lead but hadn’t put up an extraordinary week. In fact, if that score held as the winning number, it would be the lowest score by a winning team in Championship Game history. ' ' Shotti caught the game he needed from the Vikings. Without OBJ, Manning didn’t have the weapon he needed to put up the fantasy numbers MMMS had come to expect. The Giants had also been eliminated from playoff contention the previous night by the Redskins, so their morale was low. Manning was sacked four times and threw a pick 6, going into half time with negative points. Everything was going TSB’s way with the exception of one play, a 72-yard touchdown bomb to Randle at the end of the third quarter. That play alone put Manning in the positives, and ended his day with 8.86 points, his second worst game of the season. ' ' Finally, it came down to none other than CJ Anderson. The final player to go for MMMS, the man rejected by The Shotti Bunch earlier in the season. If Shotti was to lose, it would be by his own doing. Hoisted by his own petard. Or as Patrick says, “hung by his own Picard.” ' ' How close did CJ Anderson come to putting the game away for MMMS? One yard. ' ' In the fourth quarter, CJ Anderson ran for a 39 yard touchdown, his fourth of the season. That was enough to beat his projection on the day and move closer. Though he would touch the ball a couple more times, this was the play that lost the game for MMMS. In the league scoring rules, a 40+ yard touchdown run is worth 7 points (3 for a 40+ yard run, and 4 for a 40+ yard run that results in a score). Since it was a 39 yard run and not a 40, momma did not receive this massive 7 point bonus. Momma can blame Demaryius Thomas, who on the previous play earned 13 yards to bring the ball to the 39 yard line. Thomas belonged to Reign Maker, the 10th place team. In a weird way, the league’s last place finisher, and the team that just last year beat MMMS in the Championship Game, determined the winner of the 2015 League of Champions season. ' ' So it was that MMMS lost by less than 6 points on a play where they came within 1 yard of gaining the 7 they needed to win it all. TWO years in a row now the team has failed to seal the deal on the last game of the season. Congrats to Shotti and everyone else on a great year. ' ' The Third Place Game I''' don’t think any time needs to be spent on this dumpster fire. Yeah, I lost. I’ve been writing unbiased (ok, mostly unbiased) posts all season and I’m exhausted. The overtime game that won it for Shotti also lost it for me. And won third place for FreeOJ. Credit where it is due, FOJ finally bested their rival GaroppoblowMe when it counted the most. This is the first time FOJ has won multiple games in the same post-season. They’ve now lost in the semi-finals three times and came in third twice. ' ' Final Notes on 2015 *The Shotti Bunch becomes the fourth team to reach 40 combined wins in the LOC. They move into a tie with Fire Goodell for the third most wins in the league. It should be noted that The Shotti Bunch has played 12 fewer games than Fire Goodell. *Paddock 9 becomes the eighth team to reach 30 wins. They are the last of the seven teams still around from the 2011 season to reach that mark. *TEAM MANBEARPIG moves up to 12th on the combined win list out of 18 teams, a very good first season. Of the 18 teams, 8 played just one season. They also put up the fourth lowest point total by a winning team in post-season history! *8th is the worst finish for Fire Goodell in franchise history (previously finished 2nd, 6th twice, and 7th). This is the first Consolation Tournament loss for Fire Goodell. FG, who had been playing very well of late, moves into rare company. Their 132.83 was the 5th lowest point total ever recorded in the post-season. *3rd ties the best finish for FreeOJ and their best since 2011. *This is the third season that the team to knock FreeOJ out of the playoffs in the semifinals has gone on to win the trophy. The Shotti Bunch has done it twice and Papa’s Posse did it in 2011. *After starting their career 6-0 against The Shotti Bunch, ma ma momma said is on an 0-2 streak. The first loss cost them a bye, the second cost them the trophy. *Ma ma momma said has now lost back-to-back Championship Games. They are, however, the 2015 post-season scoring champion with 780.54 (Average of 260.18 per game, also the highest). That is only the fifth time a team has gone over 700 in the post-season, and third since 2011. MMMS, which is also the only team to play 77 games, moves into 1st place all time in the combined points list. *Paddock 9 has played in a record four Consolation Tournaments. In two, they played for 7th. In the other two, they played for last. They have never finished last in the league, despite finishing with the worst record on two different occasions. *There needs to be an asterisk next to this stat, but Paddock 9 has a league-best 70% win percentage in the post-season. Granted, 8 of their ten games were played in the Consolation Tournament. *A year after finishing first, Reign Maker finishes last. A good ol’ fashioned first to worst story. 2016 Draft Order Because of their win in the Consolation Tournament, TEAM MANBEARPIG will decide the top four spots. To be clear, they assign these spots to the four teams that finished 7th-10th in the consolation tournament. #TEAMMANBEARPIG/Fire Goodell/Paddock 9/Reign Maker #Fire Goodell/Paddock 9/Reign Maker/TEAM MANBEARPIG #Paddock 9/Reign Maker/TEAM MANBEARPIG/Fire Goodell #Reign Maker/TEAM MANBEARPIG/Fire Goodell/Paddock 9 #Papa's Posse #Deez Sons of Bitchez #GaroppoblowMe #FreeOJ #ma ma momma said #The Shotti Bunch Any traded draft picks will be honored and processed when the 2016 league is established. All ten teams will have to return. If teams that had traded draft picks do not return, the trade is completely voided. Schedule Reform is coming to the LOC '''I get the grumbling about what I tried to do with the customized schedule. I may disagree with the sentiment, but I understand it nonetheless. Winning teams are in a sense “punished” for being good because they have to face all the other good teams. This is the way it works in the NFL and might be the way it works someday if we decide to start keeping legacy teams (you keep the exact same roster year in and year out...pretty intense league rule) but for now, I get it. That being said, I can’t help but meddle a little bit to make things more fun. So in 2016 the following will occur: ' ' # The schedule WILL be randomized once all ten teams sign up. From 2011 to 2015, the schedule has been determined by the computer depending on when you signed up for the league. I didn’t know that until this year (always assumed it randomized), but that explains why I always played Nate first. He was always the first to sign up. 2016 I will randomize! # Once the computer randomly selects everyone’s opponents I am going to customize the ORDER in which everyone plays. This will be done prior to the draft and only done once. This will allow me to set up rivalry weeks, rematch weeks, etc. But it will keep the integrity of the league intact in that I will not be allowed to decide who anyone faces twice, just when. ' ' Keepers are Coming to the LOC Yes, I have decided that it is time to move into the realm of keepers. This will begin in 2016, with your first keeper player remaining on your roster in 2017. In other words, no one on your team this year is eligable to be kept. We will discuss how we’ll do this as the draft gets closer. I’m thinking we start off with just one or two players drafted after the third round and see how we like it in 2017 and go from there. Holy shit I can’t believe we’re talking about 2017. ' ' Score Reform is Coming to the LOC I'mportant info here folks. Several pieces of scoring reform will take effect at the start of 2016. Several I believe should be debated and voted on, and those can be discussed at a later date. As commish, in an attempt to bring the most fair and balanced scoring system to the LOC, I will be using my executive powers to enact these changes without a vote: ' ''' '''SACKS: Previously -2. New rule -0.5. The thought process behind this change is that a QB should be partly responsible for not throwing the ball away or eluding pressure, but more often than not it’s a poor offensive line that is to blame for a QB’s woes. I’d argue that as sacks are more common than interceptions, having them be worth the same is nonsensical. In 2016, it will take 4X as many sacks to get you to the overwhelming large -2 that the scoring category currently deducts. ' ' PICK-SIX THROWN: Previously -6. New Rule -4. The more I thought about this rule the more ridiculous it seemed to me. A pick is already worth -2. So if you throw a pick and it gets returned for a touchdown that’s actually a total of -8. A goal line pick-6 by Tom Brady against Dallas that wasn’t even his fault represented a 16-point swing early in the season. I will be reducing this so that a pick-six will in total be a reduction of 6 points, essentially punishing you for throwing a TD for the wrong team in the inverse amount of how much you’d be rewarded for throwing a TD for the right team. ' ' KICKER REFORM: Since 2013 there have been rumblings of the kickers carrying too much power in the league. On any given Sunday a kicker could go off for 20 points, while the very next week they might not kick once. Unlike other positions, this has little to do with how well that player is performing that day, but how the offense (which they have no part in) performs. And while I agree you should have to think long and hard about which kicker you draft based on which team they play for, maybe they carry just a tad too much weight. *50+ - Previously 7, now 5 *40-49 - Previously 6, now 5 *30-39 - Previously 5, now 4 *20-29 - Previously 4, stays 4 *0-19 - Previously 3, stays 3 ' ' Winter Meetings I’m home until February 8th and I’d love to get the whole group together to get some pizza, talk football, and go over some scoring stuff for next season. Among these scoring changes, I’d like to add a stat category that subtracts for incomplete passes. To compensate, I’d change the completion category to be worth slightly more. I’d also like to discuss adding a category for rushing attempts. The goal is to make it so every single snap your player has influences your fantasy game in some way. These are all just ideas, but FreeOJ and I discovered a couple leagues that allow for the bottom two playoff teams to get in based on their point totals instead of record. In other words, if Paddock 9 at 2-11 finished the season scoring more points than Papa’s Posse at 7-6, Paddock 9 would get in instead. Now, I see the argument both ways. Technically in that scenario P9 had the better team. They scored more points, plain and simple. But on the other hand why bother having head to head matchups if the outcome of the games don’t mean as much, so long as you score a lot of points over the whole season. That leans us more towards a league where the top 5 scores every week automatically get a W, bottom 5 get an L and we disregard head-to-head altogether. But I don’t like that. I think there is something special about sticking it to a team, and something that drives you when you lost by 0.02 points even though you had the second highest score out of everyone. But these are things to be discussed and thought about for next season. Just sleep on it… ' ' See you in Foxboro So by now I’ve spoken to most everyone about the Patriots game next week. It’s the 16th and it’s at 435. The plan as of now is to wait until a couple days before to buy tickets. Chris and I make this mistake every year, we think that we need to buy them ASAP because the prices will go up as it gets closer. That has proven, time and time again, to be the incorrect logic. The prices go down because people get more desperate to sell them before the game. ' ' *We use StubHub and we buy direct download tickets to avoid any sort of issue with getting the tickets mailed to us. I’ve gotten screwed like that with Sox tickets and even though StubHub guarentees us tickets to the game, it’s a headache I’d rather just avoid altogether. Anyone can buy tickets anywhere at any time, this is just my suggestion. I say it doesn't matter if we buy tickets together because... *In my opinion, it doesn’t matter WHERE the seats are that we buy, we won’t go to them. The cheap seats are way up in the 300’s, so far from the field that satellites scrape the top of our heads. In my experience, heading to a standing room section on the 200 level right below where the banners used to hang offers the best vantage point of the field for the money we’re going to spend. It’s on a corner and gives us a view of 98% of the field (the corner of the closest endzone is the only 2% you cannot see if I remember correctly). It is never crowded and the only downside is it’s a couple minutes walk to go get a beer, no one is going to bring you one. But that’s why… *...Parking lots open four hours prior to gametime. I would love to get there by 1 and get in a couple hours of tailgating. Early forecasts are looking good, lows 40’s, no rain. Perfect tailgate weather. *Let’s have a headcount by this coming Monday as to who is definitely in and who is definitely out so that we can plan how we’re all getting there and who will bring what to the tailgate. *If you’re not a Pats fan, you ride on the roof. I know that not all of us are Patriots fans, that’s why I’m implementing a mandatory roof ride for any non-Pats fan, unless they choose to root for the Pats on the day, since the team they normally root for are pieces of garbage and couldn’t even make the playoffs. ' ' Until Next Time... At the beginning of the season I made a comment that Star Wars was going to be the biggest blockbuster to ever hit theaters. As of today, it is the top-grossing film of all time in North America and making its ascent to dethrone Avatar at the international box office. I really wish football, and life, could be as predictable as box office numbers. Who could have ever predicted that Jamaal Charles, Le’Veon Bell, Dion Lewis, Arian Foster, and Marshawn Lynch would all be out for almost the entire year with IR or close to IR injuries? Who could have guessed that a team could make it to the semi-finals with Blake Bortles as their QB, or that Aaron Rodgers would be outscored on the season by Kirk Cousins? Who could have imagined that Peyton Manning would be a free agent on the last day of the year, or that Gary Barnidge would finish the season as a top 5 tight-end? Fantasy is as unpredictable of a game as their is to play. So who is to say that The Shotti Bunch, a team that has finished fourth or higher in each of it’s first four seasons, won’t finish last next year just like Reign Maker finished last this year? Who is to say that Paddock 9, the loveable loser of the league, doesn’t draft a powerhouse next year and take it all the way to the top? Sure, we all have brains, so we know that isn’t likely, and yet...any given Sunday, right? As I say every year, and will continue to say as long as I’m able, I am so grateful to live in this unpredictable world with you all. You are, predictably so, the best friends a guy could ever ask for. And I say truly from the bottom of my heart, I cannot wait to crush all of you next season. Until next time...